The Onion, from 28th August 2024:
Scientists at the University of California at Davis are attempting to reengineer the microbes in cows’ stomachs to produce less methane, which is a potent greenhouse gas released by the animals that contributes about 4% of global warming.
At first, I thought this was a joke because… it’s The Onion. But no, scientists are really doing that:
Using tools that snip and transfer DNA, researchers plan to genetically engineer microbes in the cow stomach to eliminate those emissions. If they succeed, they could wipe out the world’s largest human-made source of methane and help change the trajectory of planetary warming.
Jesus. I think my favourite quotes from the Onion’s piece were from “Michelle Brogan”:
“Well, it’s easier than getting cows to reduce how often they fly.”
And “Suraj Faruq”:
“Sure, what’s one more indignity?”
Rich people can rest easy—the cows will give up their lives and genomes to save the planet!